Round Perdition's Flames Part IV "First Degree Burn" "They don't need me here, and I know you're there Where the world goes by like the humid air And it sticks like a broken record Everything sticks like a broken record Everything sticks until it goes away And the truth is we don't know anything." --They Might Be Giants "Ana Ng" --Friday/Early Saturday-- Ring Ring. Ring Ring. Ring Ring. "All right already!" Major Katsuragi's delicate hand fumbled about, trying to escape her covers and find the phone. A glass of water and a half-finished bottle of beer tipped over in the process. "Hello?" she asked groggily, wondering who was calling her at this hour. Her mind generated a rather quick response, quicker than the one supplied by whoever was on the other end of the phone. If her phone rang at this hour, then it was obviously something important revolving around work. Late night calls were the one thing that caused NERV to get on her nerves. Before she had a chance to laugh at her lame pun, her attention was drawn back to the telephone. "Good, you're up." Misato sighed. "I am now, Ritsuko. What's wrong?" "I'm overtired. I thought I was fading fast back at the lab but now that I'm home I feel like I'm just radiating energy. I wish I had felt like this earlier." "Maybe you *yawn* drank too much coffee?" "You've known me a lot longer than that." "Yeah. So what's really on you your mind?" "The incident we had a few days ago at headquarters." "You mean with the Angel?" "Yes. I guess I'm still a little bit perturbed about everything that happened." "Ritsuko, it wasn't your fault. You can't just blame yourself for something like this." "How can you say that? Of course it was my fault! I should have heeded the warnings and stopped the test before it was too late, but I didn't." "You did what you thought was right at the time. There was no way you could have known. Things just started happening too fast. We all reacted to the best of our abilities. Besides, in the end, everything worked out." "That's not the point, Major!" "Then what is?" Ritsuko sighed in exasperation. "The point is that do to carelessness and unnecessary risks, the enemy--" "Stop. This isn't a secure line. We're not going to discuss this any further right now." "Misato. . .I think that we need to talk. How about breakfast?" "Can't. I've got an early morning. I've hardly gotten any sleep and I have to report for duty soon. How about dinner at my place." "I suppose." "Great, that sounds lovely." "Wait a minute, it's not your turn to cook, is it?" "No, it's Shinji's turn. But if we're going to have company I'll see if I can talk Asuka into making some instant bread in the oven. That girl is so good at it! Every time I try it always comes out hard as a rock or like dough." This comment frightened the doctor. Generally, Misato's cooking was horrid at best, but it was rare when she ever noticed, it was everyone else who suffered. "I'm sure whatever the children prepare will be adequate." "I get your point Ritsuko! I won't cook, I promise! I'll never cook for you again, all right?" "Thank you." Misato growled but quickly let go of her anger. Dr. Akagi was a lot of things, but she was Misato's friend, and the woman of purple hair new that she was only teasing. "Yeah, well, I guess I can't be good at everything." The blonde had several retorts racing through her head, but she refrained from using them. It was far too early in the morning to engage in this kind of pointless banter. Both women were a tad edgy, there was no reason to antagonize each other to any great extent. "I suppose I'll be seeing you back at the salt mines in a bit then." "Unfortunately. See you in a few." "Yes. Misato?" "Yeah?" "Thanks for talking to me." Misato started for a moment, then smiled. "No problem." "Yes, well, I know you need your beauty sleep." Misato raised an eyebrow and her grin spread out more. "You bet! But so do you." Ritsuko blushed. "Good night." "Good night." Misato hung up her telephone and pulled her covers closer around her. Sleep. She required sleep. Clutching the pillow a little more tightly, she buried her head within its softness and shut her eyes. Sleep would not elude her any longer, not if she had anything to say about it. In another bed, not all that far away, another member of the fairer sex was undergoing a different type of battle. While Misato Katsuragi was desperately trying to salvage something out of her already abbreviated beauty sleep, Rei Ayanami was struggling to stay unconscious. It did not make much sense. There was no reason to remain asleep, her body had rested enough. There was no reason to wake up, there was no function which required her attention. She liked the darkness. The light had not come into the world yet. It made little sense. It was too late to be morning, it was too early to be night. Somewhere within her unconscious, Rei realized that her actions were foolish, and so she awoke. It was dark. It was damp. It was before dawn. But her day had begun. Rei's feet found the floor, which she knew would be cold. There was not any point to wasting time. Shuffling her body out of the bed, she began her walk across the small apartment that many would refer to as her home. Rei did not share that thought. She had no home, merely a place where she dwelled, where she would rest. A home assumed some types of family relationships. She had no need for those. It was her duty to battle the Angels and safeguard the future of humanity. Commander Ikari had told her so. This made all other things secondary. She remembered once, the Third Child had inquired about why she chose to pilot Evangelion. She recalled saying that it was because she was bonded to it. There was a truth to this. It was her calling. She had been chosen by the Institute to fight the Angels, it was what she had been asked to do, and had become what she herself chose to do. It provided her life with purpose, it gave her a sense of independence. She would not go so far as to say she enjoyed it, rather that it provided her with an inner warmth. She did not make a habit out of contemplating such things very much, at least not before the Third Child had arrived. Some of the things he had said prior to their final assault on the Fifth Angel had put some questions into her mind, several which had no immediate answer. Mainly, why had he been so concerned for her personal well-being? It was for the benefit of all others that they fought the Angels in the first place, their own safety was secondary at best. His worry was irrational, yet there was still something about it that brought out unfamiliar feelings within her. His estranged relationship with his father was disturbing. The fact that the two of them had so little to say to each other did not make sense. They were different individuals, true, but they had much in common now that the Third Child had come to Tokyo-3. Perhaps the two of them were lone wolves of a sort. Rei had trouble accepting this fact, though. Shinji had endeavored to reach out to her, he had been concerned about her well being. She did not understand this. It had been her duty to protect him. She had been ordered to do so, and she would have done so to the point of her own death, had it been necessary. Yet she had come through the ordeal relatively unscathed. He had been most distraught over the damage Unit-00 had taken during the onslaught. She remembered when he had forced her entry plug open, afraid for her life. It had not made sense to her at the time. Even if there had been something wrong with her, there was likely very little he could have done to be of assistance. She remembered, he had told her that she should not say good-bye to him before they went into battle. Because. . .it was too sad. It was too sad to say good-bye? This was strange. She remembered stories she had read and conversations she had heard about people never having a chance to say good-bye before death. It left them with feelings of remorse. It seemed fitting then, that she should say good-bye before going into battle. This way, should things go poorly and one of them did not survive, then these sad feelings of remorse and regret would not be present. Yet he had insisted that it was sad to say good-bye. This was strange. It did not fit. Why was it now considered to sorrowful to say good-bye? She would make a point of asking Commander Ikari about it when there was time. Stripping off what remained of her clothes, she began to run the water in the shower. This was her usual morning routine. It had been interrupted after the misfortunate experience she had had in Unit-00 weeks before the Commander's son had come to NERV. That had been some time ago. Many Angels had come between then and now. More were certain to come. It was her job to continue protecting the world. Satisfied with the temperature of the water, she stepped inside and began to bathe herself. Her shower smelled of LCL. Even though she frequently showered in the women's locker room after testing or after a battle, she had discovered over the years that there was a certain amount of the liquid which tended to seep into her skin. Later showering apparently brought it out, hence the strange combination of soap and blood, the scent of which permeated her bathroom.. Yet there was no reason for this to bother her. It was nothing out of the ordinary, merely an observation. Her senses had always been sharp. And as long as she was able to use them, she would use them as she was obligated to. This wasn't good. It wasn't good at all. For starters, it was too early. Secondly, it was way, way too early. "My body would insist on waking up early on the one day I actually don't have business to attend to." Kaji Ryoji said, taking a look out the window. "The sun hasn't even come up yet? What kind of a day off do you call that?" Resigned to his unfortunate circumstances, the man arose from his bed and trudged into the bathroom, taking a look at himself in the mirror. "Hmpf." He said, touching a hand to his face. P I should shave off some of this grunge. Nah, it'll annoy the major if I leave it there, and where would all the fun be if I couldn't do that?" Opting instead to alleviate his usual case of morning breath, Kaji reached for his toothbrush. Ah, the joys of morning. He really couldn't think of a reason to get up at this hour, but he knew when his body was trying to tell him that he had had enough sleep. It seemed to him like the classic damned if you do, damned if you don't syndrome. Finishing up with a bit of mouthwash for added effect, he spit the last of the tooth care products out of his month and prepared himself for a good old-fashioned morning shower. Some of the simplest pleasures in life were also the most rewarding. There was something very appealing about showers. He recalled Katsuragi's ideals about bathing cleaning both the mind and the soul. He didn't know about that so much, but he did know that he liked his showers. Who wouldn't enjoy the feeling of warm water rushing over their body just after climbing out of bed. It was how he woke up in the morning. He couldn't understand how some people bathed at night. He always felt the need to shake that grogginess of with a power shower. That was one of the perverse benefits of the Second Impact. There were now a lot less people competing for fresh water, therefore the pre-Impact concept of water saving had grown more or less obsolete. Not that he had paid it much attention anyway. When he was younger, he had always taken what he called "power showers." He recalled being forced to bathe in one of those trying water-saving showers only once. The water pressure was so low it felt like the shower head was relieving itself on him. After that experience, Kaji had learned how to alter those annoying shower heads so that they let a man take a shower the way God had intended him to. He dubbed his shower head the "Water Waster." Regulating resources was fine, he wasn't greedy, but the government was going to have to keep their damn hands out of his shower stall. Besides, hadn't they ever heard of the Water Cycle? How asinine! After readying the water, playing appropriate mood music, and getting a towel close at hand in case something like an Angel attack occurred while he was showering, Kaji stepped into the stall and started his morning in his favorite way. Well, his second favorite way, at any rate. "Good Lord!" a shrill voice yelled out. Ordinarily, yelling inside of a movie theater while the movie is showing would be considered bad form, but since there were only two people watching the film at this ungodly hour, Asuka knew no one would say anything. Shinji wouldn't dare to shush her. He knew that she would kick his ass for it, she was fairly confident that she could do that without saying cruel things to him, therefore she wouldn't forfeit the bet in the process. If she put her mind to it, she could probably kick his ass while saying nice things to him, but that would probably be pushing it. "What?" Her partner in crime for the evening responded. "This acting his awful!" "I recall one of my grade school teachers saying that bad acting is preferable to bad writing." "I'd rather that both be good, thank you very much! Who the hell wrote this script?" Shinji sighed. "No idea." The boy couldn't blame her one bit. It was an awful movie, so bad that in a perverse way it was good. But the writing and acting were awful, possibly worse than anything seen on the WB Network in the pre-Second Impact days, and that in itself was saying a lot. "You have to see the comedy of it. Films like this one are so bad that they beg to be mocked." "Kind of like--" Asuka stopped herself from completing that sentence at just the last moment. She cleared her throat and had another handful of the now dwindling popcorn. An hour. She had wasted an entire hour of her life on this putrid piece of filth that they dared pass off as cinema. She found it easier to sit in class and pay rapt attention to the boring lectures about the Second Impact. Even though the teacher's head had been filled with mush and propaganda about the devastating event, at least when he spoke it always felt like he was going somewhere with it, the trouble being that he seldom ever got there before class ended and it was time to break for lunch, or, if the children were really lucky, going home. But this film looked like it had been cobbled together by a bunch of students going to a community college, at least as far as the acting went. Asuka was forced to admit that the special effects were actually fairly impressive. If only the studio had gotten some decent actors to play the roles. It was pretty obvious where the studio had spent the bulk of the budget when they made this film. It bothered Asuka quite a bit. The Second Impact was a horrible tragedy not to be taken lightly, even if she was so terribly sick of hearing about it nearly every day. Although whoever had made this movie obviously did not know about the truth behind the calamity, there was still no reason to treat it with so little regard. "Shinji?" "Huh?" "This film was supposed to provide the public with an accurate description of the events surrounding the Second Impact, right?" "Well, yeah. I mean, you and I know that it isn't the truth, but very few people are privy to that information, and considerably less were at the time it occurred." "I know that! What I'm trying to say is, why is this acting so terrible? Didn't the movie studio feel that this film was important enough to invest in decent actors? I mean, we're talking about a pivotal event in the history of the world here! How can they treat it with such little respect?" "Oh, come on Asuka! I've never known you to read so much into something! I mean, listen to this woman! She's spouting and rehashing lines from cliché disaster movies! When something is this bad, you've no choice but to just sit back and laugh." "It just. . .it really bothers me! You know, we go out there and risk our necks and give up our youth to try and save what's left of the human race! You think they'd at least be grateful! But this is the kind of tribute we get! It's like those assholes back on that aircraft carrier! Complain, complain, complain! They have absolutely no idea!" "Well, I suppose you just can't go through life expecting everyone to understand. I notice that I've actually felt a lot happier recently. I've just. . .you know, it's not a perfect life, but you just have to learn to let things flow. I used to feel at odds with so many different things. But I'm starting to learn that that kind of pain is only caused by running away. When you just let things be, let them happen, you're a lot happier." "Hmpf! Since when did you turn so philosophical?" "I haven't really gotten all that philosophical, I'm just trying to explain it to you." "Explain what?" "I-I don't know." Asuka growled and surpressed an insult. "Hey, you have to try to look at it from this standpoint. Things haven't been all that bad lately. We didn't even have to fight the last Angel, remember?" "Oh, yes, how could I ever forget?! Instead we got to sit trapped in our entry plugs for God knows how long, and we were naked to boot!" Shinji blushed. That was one detail he had been trying to forget. Trying to cover his embarrassment, the boy reached over into Asuka's lap where the popcorn tub was and tried to scoop some out. Unfortunately, he missed, his hand coming to rest on Asuka's leg instead. That was it. He was dead. He knew that there was no way he was getting out of this theater alive. Fortunately for Ikari though, Asuka's will to defeat Shinji at the little game they were playing was stronger. "Shinji." She stated coldly. "Ah, er, uh, yes?" He asked shakily. "You and I. . .this afternoon we got a lot out of our systems, didn't we?" Shinji recalled the incident that had passed between them and had to agree. "Yes." He felt confused. Why was she bringing this up? He thought she had said that she wanted to forget about their conversation. "Good. And we were able to come away from that and go back to normal, right?" He dared not to hesitate. "Yes." "Good. So, we are friends, right?" "Friends?" It was difficult to imagine the endless antagonism between himself and this girl as something akin to friendship. "I-I guess." "And we have each saved each other's lives." Shinji seemed to remember that Asuka's "saving" of him had been a tad bit forced, but her statement was nonetheless true. "Yes." "And we have a little bet going between us." "Yeah, but technically you already lost it." Asuka ignored his comment. She wouldn't allow him to derail her, there was no way she was going to allow him to get away with whatever he felt like. It was time to put Shinji in his place, and she was going to do it in such a way that he couldn't accuse her of insulting him and lose the bet. "Then that is why I am going to let you take your hand off my leg without fear of death." "O-okay." Shinji very, very carefully lifted his hand, and resisted the urge to take his other hand and guide the offending one into the popcorn bucket." Then, in cold words that had almost no emotion but felt extremely threatening nevertheless, Asuka said, "Don't ever do that again." Shinji made a mental note to comply. Asuka's voice was always loaded with emotion. Hearing her speak like that sent chills through him. The fact that it had even happened worried him as well. Was it possible that he was becoming the pervert that Asuka constantly accused him of being? No, he didn't see how. That just wasn't his style. Shinji sighed and returned his attentions to the movie. This wasn't coming together for him at all. How dare he expect it to? There wasn't anything sane about any of this. He had to question whether he had the right to even consider pursuing Asuka. And what if he did? It wasn't as though he was going to get anywhere. Maybe Misato was wrong after all. Maybe it wasn't a good situation. Maybe he would just be better off forgetting the whole thing while he could still save face... No. NO! He couldn't do it! Damnation, he couldn't help it. In that moment, he hated himself. He knew that he was undeniably falling for her, a little more each day. Damn him, and damn her. Why did she have to be so close? Why couldn't she just live somewhere else, on the other side of the city? Why did she have to be right under his nose all the time? Every time he turned around, she was there, complaining about something or insulting him. She always had something to hide, yet she knew almost all of his secrets. People rarely left him alone when he wanted to be alone, but no one dared come anywhere near the mighty Asuka of she requested to be left in peace. Who the hell was she to be able to pull that sort of thing off? It wasn't right, not at all. And yet inside he knew that his life had taken some undeniable terms since she had come into it. It was because of her that he was beginning to see more clearly. If only there was some way he could understand her better, knock a hole in that wall of hers and cut through all of her bullshit. He didn't want her to just fall into his arms, he wanted her to be more open with him, to tell him how she felt, to tell him the things that she didn't like, and generally to be his friend. It wasn't right that she did some of the things that she did, not at all. It was painful for him, and she knew it. So why was she so cruel? Because she felt that she had to be, that it was her way of protection? It was in that moment that Shinji devised a little scheme. One chance for open honesty between the two of them. It was what he longed for more than anything else, but it was perhaps asking a bit too much. It was difficult to say, Asuka might very well go along with it to get out of kitchen duty, then again she might not. Of course, he still had to make sure that she got stuck with the kitchen chores. It was a pity, that he was going to have to push the object of his affection too far so that she would blow up. He hated to antagonize her, or anyone else for that matter. He generally thought of himself as a peacekeeper. "It's a pity." He said quietly, but loud enough for Asuka to hear him. "What is?" she responded. "That you could make such a profound statement like that one but still have no idea how to read your kanji." Asuka looked at him with a death glare, her hands crushing the popcorn tub at the sides. "Do you have something to say, Third Child?" Her face was turning an angry red, and her eyes stared dagger after dagger at him. "Yes. I think that you are quite intelligent, but that it just might not be possible for you to learn all the intricacies of our language. It isn't your fault, really. The Japanese language grew out of our isolation, and it really doesn't have anything in common with most of the other languages of the world. Actually, I'm quite impressed at how well you speak it, Asuka. Don't let it get you down, kanji is very difficult." How dare he. HOW--DARE--HE! How the hell could he just sit there and proceed to tell her what she can and can't do! "Listen here you jerk! I can do anything! I was going to college while you were still in the fifth grade! Do you honestly think a little thing like your kanji is going to hold me back?!! Guess again, baka!" "All right, I take it back. Maybe I was wrong. My mistake." "You're damned right it was a mistake!!" "By the way, I win." "What?" Asuka had to think for a moment. He was right, she had insulted him. But he had provoked her. "It doesn't count! You provoked me!" "No, I didn't. I never raised my voice to you or called you any names. All I did was give you my uninformed opinion about the Japanese language. You jumped to conclusions." A guttural sound could be heard coming from Asuka's throat. "Damn you! I hate you! Fine, bets off, I lose! I don't mind doing the dishes as long as I can kick your ass first!!!" Shinji did the only thing he knew how to do. He jumped out of his seat and ran. He heard Asuka get up after him. The two ran around the theater, but at some point Shinji found an indentation in the wall and pressed himself against it. Asuka ran past him, and seconds later Shinji dove out into one of the rows, laying himself underneath a row of seats. He was sure that if he stayed very quiet, Asuka wouldn't find him, and she would eventually tire and lose interest. This wasn't going well, not at all. He kept finding ways to antagonize her instead of being nice to her. Why oh why couldn't he just fall for a normal girl? "Shinji! When I find you I am going to grind you into pieces and feed you to Pen-Pen!" Shinji winced and looked at his watch, activating the tiny light on the face. It was just past 4:30. Another hour and a half to go. Somehow, he would make it, he had to. He had a real idea now, if he could just manage to survive. He would challenge Asuka. Somewhere deep inside the recesses of Shinji's mind, the rational half of him asked whether he wanted daises or chrysanthemums. He quickly turned that part of him off. He couldn't afford to get himself hung up, and he couldn't afford to keep doubting himself. He had committed himself to the pursuit of Asuka, he now had to follow through with it. How could he face himself every morning if he didn't? Shinji though he heard a light footstep nearby and instantly he held his breath. God only knew what she would do to him if she found him while she was still riled up. He had to survive long enough to get just five minutes of honesty. That's all he required. For her part, Asuka tip-toed her way up to Shinji in pleasure, approaching from an adjacent row so that he would not be able to see her walk past. It had taken her some doing to find out where he had gone, but she had figured it out by ducking down on the floor and scanning under each and every sheet. If Shinji had been wearing anything but a white shirt, she probably wouldn't have been able to find him. Asuka was now standing over her roommate, in the row just behind him. "Shinji." Shinji wanted to run, but he couldn't. He had moved himself into a position that was not exactly easy to get out of. "Ahhh! Asuka! I'm sorry!" "Oh, no, Shinji, it's really quite all right." He didn't like this. There was something sickeningly sweet about her voice. Something that struck fear into his soul. Yes, he was afraid of her. Not just of what she might do to him now, but what she might do to him in the long run. He didn't have time to contemplate this any longer though." "You got up so quickly that you left this behind. I wouldn't want it to go to waste." Asuka promptly overturned the remaining contents of the popcorn onto him. Just what he needed, to smell of butter and salt. He was definitely going to need a change of clothes before going to school now. Before he had time to react, he felt something ice cold on the crotch of his pants. He added a shower to his 'to do' list when they got back to the apartment. That amount of soda would not only soak his pants, but bleed through onto his skin. He didn't relish being sticky in that area all day. "I thought you might like a little something to wash that down with. Here, you can finish mine as well if you like." Shinji saw the cup turning over and managed to roll himself out of the way to avoid a second onslaught of the sticky liquid. Rolling out from under the seats, Shinji pulled himself to a standing position. "Okay, fine, I deserved that." Asuka's only reply was a snort. "I suppose you want to leave?" "What time is it?" Asuka queried in an annoyed voice. "A little after 4:30." "Oh, that's just great! I have to spend a whole 'nother hour and a half with you like this! This is ridiculous! It isn't fair of Misato at all! Forget this, I'm going my own way!" She turned to leave. "No! Don't! Come on Asuka, it was funny! I mean, look at me!" Asuka turned her body around enough to take a look at the shy boy. He wasn't lying. He had pieces of popcorn stuck to him and he looked as though he had soiled himself. "Let's stay, Asuka, come on. It was all in good fun, right?" Maybe, maybe not. The fiery Eva pilot really didn't know. Asuka quickly weighed over the options in her mind. She could leave and amuse herself for the next ninety minutes, but she might run into some perverts or something. Not that she couldn't take care of herself, but why should she stick her neck out? Over Shinji? He wasn't with getting so annoyed over! Even if he was a wimp and a pervert. "All right." She grumbled at length. "I'll stay. But don't you dare try to touch me or insult me again!" "I promise." She grinned at him. "Baka." Shinji breathed a sigh of relief. This was turning out to be a lot more complex than he could have ever imagined, and it was only just beginning..... ************************************************************************ Legal Lingo-- I don't have anything to do with Neon Genesis Evangelion. I didn't produce it, I didn't create it, and I don't pretend to have! This series is copyright by Gainax, A.D.V. Films holds the rights to the English Language Version. The author makes no claim whatsoever to any of the characters or the setting contained within this work, merely the situation in which they have been placed. Standard disclaimers apply. No substitutions, exchanges, or refunds. Batteries not included. Thanks you've all been a great crowd, don't forget to tip your servers on the way out. Amen. ************************************************************************ =============================================================== = This has been an official Swead Entertainment fanfic! = = Visit Swead Entertainment @ http://www.intcon.net/~sonny/se = ===============================================================